Page:Fielding - Sex and the Love Life.pdf/116
build their hopes of happiness on marriage; but in order to have the realization compare favorably with the expectation, it is necessary that they know something tangible of the profound realities that are bound up in marriage.
It is one thing to anticipate matrimony with a romantically sentimental notion of what marriage implies. This notion is gathered, not only from an endless stream of fiction, but in no small degree from the actual teachings and misrepresentations that are inculcated in the name of education and social forms.
It is an entirely different thing to prepare for marriage with an understanding of the duties and responsibilities that are involved in this serious undertaking; of the love and joys, the trials and triumphs, that are the logical fruits of an intimate reciprocal relationship and mutual adjustment, and of the actual sexual foundation that underlies the whole complex structure.
COURTSHIP AS A PREPARATION FOR MARRIAGE
Not an Educational Substitute. Under modern social conditions, and from the standpoint of prevailing ideas on the sexual question, the nearest approach to preparation for marriage is obtained in courtship. Of course, it cannot be considered as a substitute for such a genuine preparation as has been advocated in the form of a well-rounded educational program from childhood; this program to embrace an understanding of biology in general and sexual ethics in particular.
However, we shall consider courtship in its more or less conventional sense, with its limitations and advantages. Even young people who have never been adequately informed upon the subject of sex, usually are unconsciously groping for a practical solution of their problems in courtship.