Page:Fielding - Sex and the Love Life.pdf/117

As young people normally approach adulthood, they feel the attraction for the opposite sex in a general way, and more especially for some particular individual of that sex. Sometimes this attraction reaches quite an acute stage upon very short acquaintance, even at the first meeting, as we have discussed it in a previous chapter under the classification of "love at first sight." But, as time has abundantly proven, marriages based on so superficial an acquaintance are rarely successful. Hence, the desirability of courtship as a period of intimate association and companionship.

It is because of the lack of psychological insight on the part of both young men and young women that unnecessary misunderstandings sometimes occur when the promptings of love make themselves felt; at least both parties feel themselves baffled by the strange tactics of each other, except insofar as they have acquired some haphazard knowledge, or have been fortunate in their intuitive gifts.

For instance, the tactics of the man in courtship, as well as in his biological rôle generally, tend to be active, even aggressive, whereas, the woman is disposed to be passive, at times resistant, and reserved, perhaps procrastinating. When he is satisfied that their love is real and taken for granted, he wishes to rush the matter through at once, to marry, or consummate their bliss in complete union, which is in keeping with the aggressive rôle of the male.

On the other hand, very often the young woman displays an attitude of reserve and hesitancy that altogether baffles her Romeo—perhaps it would be evidenced even more often than it is were it not for the artificial stimulus of social ambition or economic pressure.

As Gallichan observes: "The contest between the vehement wooer and his defensive partner is not without real stress and often torment, even when both are enthused by