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171 STRAIT IS THE GATE

She smiled again, and shook her head. "All that I brought away from my last visit to Pascal..." "Was what? " I asked, for she stopped. “This saying of Christ's: "Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it.' And as for that,” she went on, smiling still more and looking me steadily in the face, “I really hardly understood him any longer. When one has lived any time in the society of such lowly ones as these, it is extraordinary how quickly the sublimity of the great leaves one breathless and exhausted.” Would my discomposure allow me no answer? “If I were obliged to read all these sermons and tracts with you now ..." “But,” she interrupted, “I should be very sorry to see you read them! I agree with you; I think you were meant for much better things than that.” She spoke quite simply and without seeming to suspect that my heart might be rent by these words which implied the separation of our lives. My head was burning; I should have liked to go on speaking; I should have liked to cry; perhaps my tears would have vanquished her; but I remained without saying a word, my elbows on the mantelpiece, my head buried in my hands. She went on calmly arranging her flowers, seeing