Page:Life's little ironies (1894).pdf/249

drew: ‘My man,I see you don’t play your instrument with the rest. How is that?

“Every one of the choir was ready to sink into the earth with concern at the fix Andrew was in. We could seo that he had fallen into a cold sweat, and how he would get out of it we did not know.

“Iv'e bad a misfortune, mem,’ he says, bowing as meek as a child. ‘Coming along the road I fell down and broke my bow.’

“Oh, I am sorry to hear that, eays she. ‘Can't it be mended ?”

“Oh no, mem,’ says Andrew. ‘’Iwas broke all to splinters.’

"'I'll see what I can do for you,’ says she.

“And then it seemed all over, and we played ‘ Rejoice, ye drowsy mortals all,’ in D and two sharps. But no sooner had we got through it than she says to Andrew :

"I've sent up into the attic, where we have some old musical instruments, and found a bow for you.’ And she hands the bow to poor wretched Andrew, who didn’t even know which end to take hold of, ‘Now we shall have the full accompaniment,’ says she.

“ Andrew's face looked as if it were made of rotten apple as he stood in the circle of players in front of his book; for if there was one person in the parish that everybody was afraid of ’twas this hook-nosed old lady. However, by keeping a little behind the next man he managed to make pretence of beginning, sawing away with his bow without letting it touch the strings, so that it looked as if he were driving into the tune with heart and soul, "Tis a question if he wouldn't have got through all right if one of the squire’s visitors, no other than the archdeacon, hadao’t noticed that he held the fiddle upside-down, the nut