Page:Loeb Classical Library L205N (1958).djvu/275
I should be glad, however, if what has been arranged by my family without my knowledge turns out happily, as you so kindly and courteously pray it may, for myself and my dear Tullia.[1] But that this should happen to be arranged at that particular time! I hope and pray that it may in any event be blessed with some degree of happiness—but anyhow, while I hope it may be so, I find more to comfort me in your wisdom and kind sympathy than in any feeling that the time was opportune.[2] So how to manage a smooth ending to what I had begun to say, I cannot discover. I ought not to speak too gloomily of what you yourself so auspiciously bless, at the same time I do feel some prickings of conscience; but of one thing I am not afraid—that you will fail to understand clearly that what was done was done by others, to whom my instructions were, that, as I was going to be so far away, they should not ask my advice, but do what they thought best.
3 Here, however, the question suggests itself to me, "What then would you have done, had you been on the spot?" I should have ratified the engagement, but done nothing as regards the time of the marriage without your approval or without your advice. You see I am panting and puffing with my long struggle to find some way of defending what I am bound to defend without at the same time offending you. Relieve me then of this burden; it seems to me I have never had to deal with a more difficult case. Anyhow, of this you may be sure, that had I not already at that time most carefully settled everything without detriment to your very distinguished position, though I should have thought that no enhancement of my former devotion to you was