Pansies (Lawrence)/Nullus

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NULLUS
I know I am nothing.Life has gone away, below my low-water mark.
I am aware I feel nothing, even at dawn.The dawn comes up with a glitter and a blueness, and I say: How lovely!—But I am a liar, I feel no loveliness, it is a mental remark, a cliché.
My whole consciousness is clichéand I am null;I exist as an organismand a nullus.
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But I can do nothing about itexcept admit it and leave it to the moon.There are said to be creative pauses,pauses that are as good as death, empty and dead as death itself.And in these awful pauses the evolutionary change takes place.Perhaps it is so.The tragedy is over, it has ceased to be tragic, the last pause is upon us.Pause, brethren, pause!

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