today years old

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today years old (not comparable)

1. (Internet slang, humorous) One's current age (to the day).

   He was four years old when he learned that toads are different from frogs, but he was today years old when he learned that the mutual exclusiveness of that distinction is only a matter of folk taxonomy, not scientific taxonomy.

   • 2018 September 1, Spohr, Mike, “19 Mind-Blowing Things People Learned When They Were "Today Years Old"”, in BuzzFeed^[1], archived from the original on 11 August 2020.
   • 2019 July 3, Jaimie Vandenbergh, “OT Jeff Bezos: Forget Mars, humans will live in these free-floating space pod colonies”, in rec.arts.sf.written‎^[2] (Usenet), message-ID <ubunhelmhocu69hg4h0f28koec2au11j8p@4ax.com>:

     My word. I can't believe I was today years old when I first heard of this.

   • 2020 May 5, Bicycle Belle Ding Ding!, “Admissions of Things You Ought to Have Known But Did Not: A Thread”, in RBW Owners Bunch‎^[3] (Usenet), message-ID <4C0F9CD0-262B-4D76-8485-411F4C33286A@gmail.com>:

     Steve was today years old when he learned not to guess at a woman’s weight.

Almost always used when humorously discussing information one just learnt, as if referring more traditionally to the age in years at which one learnt it.